the rumors are true, lea michele and i learned how to read together
i took the tasc... i passed it... i won! i wasn't planning on flexing my high school equivalency knowledge on the gram but i decided this is the note i want to end the decade on
the note of my mild to moderate intelligence
i dropped out of high school when i was sixteen and some part of me has felt lesser ever since. it's an illogical part but that's life, pussycats, our brains only make sense 5.5% of the time. the rest of the time they're preoccupied by the complexities of breastfeeding baby yoda or maneuvering sex on a peloton bike
while i don't regret dropping out, over the years i've internalized the truth that i'm very very stupid. maybe because you guys, my most beloved fans, are always affectionately referring to me as very very stupid? i love it, don't get me wrong! i feed off of attention, negative or positive. who needs dinner when you have strangers calling you a dumb slut on al gore's internet? i save soooo much on groceries, whenever i'm hungry i can log onto twitter and see abigail from wisconsin calling me racial slurs and i'm satiated
i'm an insult succubus
what i'm saying is i love accepting two energies
garden variety affection is cool
but even better is the all consuming rage of hating a chick you've never met who's way better looking than you are but sadly cannot flex like jameela jamil about being a multi-millionaire because music doesn't pay and she was never smart enough to monetize activism
i love jameela jamil and i do not know if she makes cash money off calling you the landlord of your uterus but i do know she will somehow read this and respond to it on twitter because she's as obsessed with the court of public opinion as i am
i had an abortion when i was a teenager! abortions are the best! so glad to have had my abortion, might even have another some day
how'd we get here? what i'm really saying is not that i'm horny for degradation but that i felt compelled to "better" myself or whatever this year. or at the very least prove to myself i could do geometry with a metaphorical gun to my head
i am very very anti-gun
i once had a boyfriend who owned a gun but that's because he was having paranoid delusions about being stalked, so it was fine
here's a fun fact: most of your favs are borderline fucking braindead! me included. am i still super dumb? probably yeah but now i can find the slope of a line under duress and that means something i think. can the gals of @nastycherryband say the same? i think not (just kidding i love you kids i'm sure at least one of you graduated high school)
i'd like to thank the academy and the brooklyn adult learning center for their free fast track math classes
i did it, mom!
my mom doesn't follow me on instagram
masochism is n e v e r coming out
be good to each other and yourselves, i've maybe said too much
love you always forever near or far closer together,
nazanin
postscript: please enjoy the photos of yuletide cheer! this is my first christmas tree and my first child and i hope both bring you peace in this hellscape we call earth. beauty is the only truth we have. put that on a bumper sticker! i'm not high fyi
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den1zar coming back to instagram after a month to drag a bunch of woman artists for no reason? sounds about Naz
kristinallegro congratulations mom ๐๐๐
ssissily is this another mental breakdown? lmaoooooooo queen
jodiemaxine You only released one album this decade Nazanin when you promised us two ๐ you are my all time idol and I really look up to you and everything about you is amazing and you're so beautiful and strong and I aspire to be just like you but you are a stupid lying Bitch too
naz@jodiemaxine yes it's true i'm all these things i'm multi-faceted love u jodie
wavvybarbie Is no one gonna acknowledge the roach pic???? Gross af, trigger warning next time
naz@wavvybarbie you can't trigger warning motherhood bitch
urinstacrush like this comment if you've been waiting almost seven years for ๐น Masochism ๐น
andreyzwan CADE MASOCHISM VIADA? Esse รกlbum nรฃo vai sair nunca?!
popbarbieboi Girl you gotta stop doing crack ๐
itsalexabitch@nastycherryband are walmart naz knockoffs and we all know it
naz@itsalexabitch look alexa... they can't be me because they're actively making music! i'm in purgatory. still a feature would be nice. let them know, their minder charli isn't returning my sexts
xxmiss.massacrexx this selfie is EVERYTHING
Liked by nastycherryband and others
4 HOURS AGO
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the rumors are true, lea michele and i learned how to read together
i took the tasc... i passed it... i won! i wasn't planning on flexing my high school equivalency knowledge on the gram but i decided this is the note i want to end the decade on
the note of my mild to moderate intelligence
i dropped out of high school when i was sixteen and some part of me has felt lesser ever since. it's an illogical part but that's life, pussycats, our brains only make sense 5.5% of the time. the rest of the time they're preoccupied by the complexities of breastfeeding baby yoda or maneuvering sex on a peloton bike
while i don't regret dropping out, over the years i've internalized the truth that i'm very very stupid. maybe because you guys, my most beloved fans, are always affectionately referring to me as very very stupid? i love it, don't get me wrong! i feed off of attention, negative or positive. who needs dinner when you have strangers calling you a dumb slut on al gore's internet? i save soooo much on groceries, whenever i'm hungry i can log onto twitter and see abigail from wisconsin calling me racial slurs and i'm satiated
i'm an insult succubus
what i'm saying is i love accepting two energies
garden variety affection is cool
but even better is the all consuming rage of hating a chick you've never met who's way better looking than you are but sadly cannot flex like jameela jamil about being a multi-millionaire because music doesn't pay and she was never smart enough to monetize activism
i love jameela jamil and i do not know if she makes cash money off calling you the landlord of your uterus but i do know she will somehow read this and respond to it on twitter because she's as obsessed with the court of public opinion as i am
i had an abortion when i was a teenager! abortions are the best! so glad to have had my abortion, might even have another some day
how'd we get here? what i'm really saying is not that i'm horny for degradation but that i felt compelled to "better" myself or whatever this year. or at the very least prove to myself i could do geometry with a metaphorical gun to my head
i am very very anti-gun
i once had a boyfriend who owned a gun but that's because he was having paranoid delusions about being stalked, so it was fine
here's a fun fact: most of your favs are borderline fucking braindead! me included. am i still super dumb? probably yeah but now i can find the slope of a line under duress and that means something i think. can the gals of @nastycherryband say the same? i think not (just kidding i love you kids i'm sure at least one of you graduated high school)
i'd like to thank the academy and the brooklyn adult learning center for their free fast track math classes
i did it, mom!
my mom doesn't follow me on instagram
masochism is n e v e r coming out
be good to each other and yourselves, i've maybe said too much
love you always forever near or far closer together,
nazanin
postscript: please enjoy the photos of yuletide cheer! this is my first christmas tree and my first child and i hope both bring you peace in this hellscape we call earth. beauty is the only truth we have. put that on a bumper sticker! i'm not high fyi
Load more comments
den1zar coming back to instagram after a month to drag a bunch of woman artists for no reason? sounds about Naz
kristinallegro congratulations mom ๐๐๐
ssissily is this another mental breakdown? lmaoooooooo queen
jodiemaxine You only released one album this decade Nazanin when you promised us two ๐ you are my all time idol and I really look up to you and everything about you is amazing and you're so beautiful and strong and I aspire to be just like you but you are a stupid lying Bitch too
naz @jodiemaxine yes it's true i'm all these things i'm multi-faceted love u jodie
wavvybarbie Is no one gonna acknowledge the roach pic???? Gross af, trigger warning next time
naz @wavvybarbie you can't trigger warning motherhood bitch
urinstacrush like this comment if you've been waiting almost seven years for ๐น Masochism ๐น
andreyzwan CADE MASOCHISM VIADA? Esse รกlbum nรฃo vai sair nunca?!
popbarbieboi Girl you gotta stop doing crack ๐
itsalexabitch @nastycherryband are walmart naz knockoffs and we all know it
naz @itsalexabitch look alexa... they can't be me because they're actively making music! i'm in purgatory. still a feature would be nice. let them know, their minder charli isn't returning my sexts
xxmiss.massacrexx this selfie is EVERYTHING