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the ideal husband
6,204 Tweets
the ideal husband @naz
people are always saying i look kind-hearted
  linktr.ee/naz     Joined September 2008
96 Following      511k Followers
Followed by Twin Peaks on Showtime, Rostam, and 26 others you follow
Pinned Tweet
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Mar 7
i'm really sad today because ami mizuno is in retrograde                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jan 18 if c. left e. then who's going to b. the awkward elder at all my povertycore themed dinner parties from now on                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jan 18 you're in his dms, i'm playing cards with three jeffs                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jan 18 if i were in a cult i think i'd probably run the cult's twitter                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Aug 1 i never liked fight club so that's fine

rae @motionthickness
Replying to @naz
what do you think about bret easton ellis calling you talentless
                       
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jan 18 hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have at the nail salon                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Oct 24 ottessa moshfegh mispronounces her own name with her whole chest and i like that about her                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Aug 1 i don't know what a parasocial relationship is and if it's not about fucking a ghost then i don't care to learn

rae @motionthickness
Replying to @naz
AND THAT'S ON PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS BABY
                       
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Oct 24 i don't subtweet! so if you're in my mentions ranting about how your fav is the real deal, that's like projection or something man                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Oct 24 the pop girl you've chosen as your avatar in street fighter v doesn't need to be everything you're not                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Oct 24 it's not a hard rule but if your fav is in a room with six other professional songwriters then they're probably not the lyrical savant you (or they) think they are and that's okay                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Aug 1 "it's the middle of the night / and i'm so gone" the original lyric was "it's the middle of the night / and i'm forlorn" and i didn't know what forlorn meant so i scribbled over it and sang that instead

rae @motionthickness
Replying to @naz
if you're serious -- you're not the one??
                       
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Oct 24 name one of my songs and i can probably narrow my contributions down to 2-3 lines or phrases                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Oct 24 i'm no music historian but the obsession with "self-made" pop stars who are also songwriters feels like a new-ish phenom                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Aug 1 none of them and i've never been shy about saying so

rae @motionthickness
Replying to @naz
How many lines of "Everything is Embarrassing" did you actually write?
                       
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Oct 23 you can snitch tag courtney love if you want but she has me blocked and all you'll do is trigger a tirade i won't even see                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Aug 1 no but we do share a diva cup

rae @motionthickness
Replying to @naz
don't you and @veronicatwitter share a car???
                       
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Aug 1 i couldn't get a veronica ritter feature so it's dead in the water

rae @motionthickness
Replying to @naz
but girl…. where is the goddamn alBUM 😭 ‼️
                       
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jul 29 philip zombardo wrote the first draft of he's all that                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jul 29 am i a social experiment? am i a fucking bet?                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jul 29 i was a failed industry plant and people don't talk about that enough                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jul 29 i say "at" and not "on" because the spit did not land                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jul 29 when i was 16, i met courtney love at the chateau marmont and she spit at me because i told her rebel girl was my favorite hole song                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Aug 1 you do coke with a war widow one time and suddenly

rae @raebelle
Replying to @naz
why is courtney love on live saying she has "lots and lots of stories" that she can't tell about you??
                       
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Aug 1 the last time i thought critically i broke a blood vessel in my right eye                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Aug 1 ama but vapid questions only please                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jul 30 rebecca r. black has done more for me than susan b. anthony                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jul 29 live, laugh, lava                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Oct 23 i once cried at a friend's birthday party because he wouldn't let me enter a legally binding contract to buy andrew keegan's psychic parrot                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jul 28 dev hynes was right, everything is embarrassing                        
the ideal husband @naz ∙ Jul 28 every few months some post-tumblr schmuck tweets "naz was right, everything is embarrassing" and gets 3k likes                        




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